The secret to finding joy

Here is the reflection I shared with those who came to pray with us today, based on the teaching Jesus shared with his disciples when they asked him how they should pray.

It’s all about relationships

Each one of us was born into a family.  We all have a mother, we all have a father, some of us have brothers and sisters, perhaps we are even fortunate enough to have known our grandparents, our aunts and uncles, our cousins.  As we grow, we meet other people: some of them share common experiences with us, some share interests, some actually become friends.  In each case, there is a relationship that develops based on how much of ourselves we are willing to share with the other, and how much of themselves they are willing to share with us.  If we are fortunate, we will have one or two of these people who love us enough to want to celebrate our successes, and if they truly love us, they will constantly challenge us to never settle for second best, but rather to always strive to be the best us we can be.

Every one of us who has discovered the family of Jesus is additionally fortunate because in Jesus, we have the ultimate brother who is infinitely patient with us.  He will always love us, he will always gently but persistently challenge us to be the best that we can be … in everything.  Even if we turn our backs on him, he will always wait. Even if we confine him to the shadows of our existence, eventually, when we are ready, he will always be waiting for us, always believing in us, always willing to help us to start again.

We know that at a certain point, Jesus came to know each of the disciples and they came to know him.  Perhaps they had heard him speaking, perhaps they had entered into conversation with him, but then he had invited them to follow him.  Even if they themselves may have been hesitant at first, he believed in them.  Maybe in the beginning they did not understand why he would so often spend time in prayer, but he knew that as they came to know him, they would slowly understand that it was important for him do this – to spend time in conversation with his Father – and eventually, as they came to know about His Father, they would also understand that God is our Father, and they too would want to enter into conversation with Him.

Throughout history, human beings have discovered that when we are not in conversation with others, including our heavenly Father, things go wrong.  For a little while, we can fool ourselves into thinking that it is possible for us to go through life on our own, but eventually we all realize that we need other people: the people who truly love us, the ones who challenge us to be the best that we can be (cf Gn 18:20-32).

Only when the disciples realized this truth, only when they asked Jesus to teach them how to speak to the Father did he explain the words we heard in today’s gospel.  Even today, we use these same words because they help us to enter into conversation with our Father, and if we pay close attention to the words of the Lord’s Prayer, we will see that each part of the prayer is designed to help us to remember everything that is essential for us to be the best that we can be: … hallowed be thy name … give us each day our daily bread … forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us (Lk 11:1-3).

My grandmother used to tell me that the secret to finding joy was to have priorities about what is truly important in your life.  In everything you do, try first to please Jesus.  Second, try your best to do things for others.  Then, once these have been tended to, focus on yourself.  Jesus-Others-Yourself.  J-O-Y.

Life is all about relationships: relationships with Jesus, relationships with other people, and how these relationships help us to be the best that we can be.  Strive every day to do what Jesus asks of you, try every day to do things for others, and you will find that in the end you will discover the secret to real and lasting joy.